Woman to Man

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Who are you to me?
Often I ask myself
Friend or lover
father, son,
twin or brother?
Perhaps, bits of all
to make that one whole
that make me whole.
One to whom
I keep reverting for answers
To life’s questions
Big or small.

This half life of mine
gains meaning,
when every moment
I live and pine
searching for you
losing sleep and myself
gaining images of you
now here, now there
needlessly including you
even when you do or do not care.

Then spending tormenting, chilling,
sleepless nights of introspection
Finding only one answer-
that for you
woman means only a reflection
of your own love-
just a fleeting deception.

Friend or lover,
father, son,
twin or brother,
whoever you be–
Some where along the cycles
of birth after birth
a part of the SELF parted
as I came to earth.

How I kept wandering,
searching in vain
searching for the half
that raises me to infinity
birthing again and again
yearning since eternity;
which in you, I now realise
else, why would I
ache and sigh with teary eyes
seeing you despairing or in pain,
or rejoice in your successes and gain
or want to shower you
with the wealth of love.

In you seeking answers to life’s questions
even as you go looking for answers
to your life’s questions
in your own way
with your own answers
while I wait and pray.

  
About the author
In love with life, I am a retired gynaecologist and have always wanted to be a writer but there never was time; I loved reading but there never was time. A busy career and three children kept me away from myself. Even then I would steal moments and write, off and on. Many of my poems and stories are inspired by my patient's lives particularly one who was an actress. I have been closely associated with Mother Teresa's home and other social welfare institutions at Jalandhar, Punjab. I've been President, Lioness club, Jal. and was one of the two women in Asia to be awarded by International President of The Lions Club International in recognition of work done for women's welfare. I also was on the advisory board of A.I.R. & Doordarshan, Jalandhar and chairperson of several social and cultural organisations. I enjoy Sufi music, Gurbani, & Indian classical music. Have won many awards for theatre and oratory. Now 69, I finally got over my technophobia and am learning to operate this laptop by a hit & miss method, almost independently. I'm enjoying every bit as I've found this platform for sharing my writings. I also enjoy cooking and embroidery. Off and on I try my hand at sketching too. I'm sure to enjoy my love affair with Morsels & juices and savour each flavour and colour. Wish me all joy and fun.
  1. Such a beautiful and pure expression of a yearning. Your poem always inspires me to look deeper into self. You and your wise words are precious and an inspiration.

  2. Thank you Anisha, your words are so inspiring-gently nudging me to keep writing. Most of these poems were written years ago but in a slightly different vein. With time as my perspective changes I alter the thoughts slightly . Earlier they would be in a suffering or complaining tone . Today I try to be in a solution mode rather than the problem or victim mode. I have fought many a battle in life and have always tried to overcome hurdles and come out a winner for I FIRMLY BELIEVE NO PROBLEM SHOULD BE CONSIDERED TOO BIG FOR A HUMAN BEING TO HANDLE WITH DIGNITY AND A SENSE OF FREEDOM FROM THE PAIN OF THAT PROBLEM. AMEN !

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