Death My Only Friend



Death my only friend

Now at last I woo thee

Having died a million deaths

And birthed a million times

Each moment that I fled from thee.

Breathing a few breaths

Between births and deaths

Passionately indulging in each with

the joy to just be!

From the moment I was born

you wooed me

with every new sun of every new dawn

with every sickness that I survived

and through child births when I wished you away

even as life’s alluring treasures

swung me sky-high in their sway

and in the very next breath

dashed to dust and reduced

like a fickle mistress flirted

beguiling me, enticing me

till I was seduced

succumbing to promises untrue that be.

In the outward ‘doing’ I forgot the inward ‘being’

losing the language of loving and longing

while the salt of tears kept festering my wounds

and the self  lost all sense of belonging.

My tongue honey sweet and my heart so bitter

I kept putting the salve

of glamour and glitter

on the scars of what I’ve seen

the scars of what I’ve been

scars that I probe

wanting to freshen fading memories

trying to salvage a few episodes of ecstasy

that were my share of life’s joys

but always edged with the lace of agony.

Feverishly with forgetful wrinkled fingers

I darn the frayed edges of memories

but only images of decayed doings linger

with half  black there was only half the white

with half  wrong I could only be half right.

Now I tire of the double faced goddess of life

Hearing your music as you beckon me

Drowning the stifled cries of my screams

When nightmares come

to choke my dreams

And as I tire of too long a living

In the dualities of life

Oh! DEATH, my only friend allow me to surrender

All struggle and strife

As you come to release me

From problems and pain

Wiping out all losses all gain

Having relished all that life offered me

I’ve given it back my best!

And in the abiding peace of your embrace

I now lay me down to rest!





About the author
In love with life, I am a retired gynaecologist and have always wanted to be a writer but there never was time; I loved reading but there never was time. A busy career and three children kept me away from myself. Even then I would steal moments and write, off and on. Many of my poems and stories are inspired by my patient's lives particularly one who was an actress. I have been closely associated with Mother Teresa's home and other social welfare institutions at Jalandhar, Punjab. I've been President, Lioness club, Jal. and was one of the two women in Asia to be awarded by International President of The Lions Club International in recognition of work done for women's welfare. I also was on the advisory board of A.I.R. & Doordarshan, Jalandhar and chairperson of several social and cultural organisations. I enjoy Sufi music, Gurbani, & Indian classical music. Have won many awards for theatre and oratory. Now 69, I finally got over my technophobia and am learning to operate this laptop by a hit & miss method, almost independently. I'm enjoying every bit as I've found this platform for sharing my writings. I also enjoy cooking and embroidery. Off and on I try my hand at sketching too. I'm sure to enjoy my love affair with Morsels & juices and savour each flavour and colour. Wish me all joy and fun.

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